40+ years of schooling

Not to be braggadocios, but I have been in school for 3/4 of my life.

Last year, I began my pursuit of a MBA degree from Villanova University.  My concentration is in Church Management.  Here, I will learn how to leverage my 40 years of work experience and help with the administrative duties and operations at St. Teresa's.

The degree will take approximately 2 years and is exclusively online.  Nonetheless, there are occasional events, workshops, and volunteer work.

Some have asked whether I need a degree to work within a parish.  After all, many pastors and associate priests within a parish learn on the job and seem to make it work.  The problem is that we cannot follow our old processes.

Since there is an absence of youth, we must stop waiting for them to come.  Instead, we must learn the needs of today's generation (i.e. millennials).  Speaking for myself, the only way I can learn is through working with youth and today's interdependency with technology.

In short, despite several masters degrees (Sociology, Psychology, and Social Work), a Ph.D., and 30 years with the Board of Education, I'm back in school again.

Go CATS!

Gardening: Reap what I sow

In my humble estimation, I wouldn't describe myself as having a green thumb.  In fact, 9 out of my 10 plants don't make it past the season.  And as a result, one can find me in Home Depot's gardening section on Sunday afternoons looking to buy replacement plants.

The hard truth is, gardening is hard.  Each plant requires different soil and constant maintenance.  My measly tomatoes become easy targets for squirrels and other vermin.  But the process is cathartic. Gardening allows me to enjoy nature, gives me moments of meditation, and help create life.

Gratitude should be our default attitude

Between Columbia and Union Street in Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn, there was a neighborhood pizzeria.  After picking my son after work, Philip wanted a slice and I felt inclined to take him.   Almost all New Yorkers can remember the squeegee men of the 1990s.

On this particular day, after ignoring the squeegee man's services to wash my windshield with a white stained t-shirt, the gentlemen asked if he could have a dollar for pizza.  Appealing to my good nature, I offered him the dollar.  As we walked towards the pizzeria, he came back and asked if he could have money for a soda.  Here, I was taken aback to Luke's story of the ungrateful healed lepers.  Here was a man that asked money for food.  I gave him money for food and he came back asking for more.

Still, I would still try to do good.  I told the gentleman that I had soft drinks in the trunk of the car, having returned from the market.  The gentlemen responded that he wanted a soft drink that was iced. And this is when I chose to end our conversation.

Chinese parents: Developmental delays doesn't mean stupid

Over the past 25 years, I have evaluated over nearly a thousand of Chinese-American students (K-12).  I have seen 7 year olds unable to produce declarative statements but was able to read within a few years with speech therapy and educational resources.  I had a junior high school student that was deemed "a delinquent destined for jail" but improved with counseling.  And I have seen some very heartbreaking episodes requiring government intervention.    These Chinese students are not beyond repair.  In fact, in most cases, these students can be treated, can function socially and keep up with their studies.  The most important element is the involvement of parents. 

The answer sounds simple.  However, the reality is Chinese students are often the product of immigrants with little or no education, low English proficiency, and are employed as day laborers with little time to participate with schoolwork.   And as a result, these Chinese parents only see the superficial problems in low test grades and high absenteeism.  Parents develop attitudes that their's child is "lazy" and/or "stupid."  Often it takes a teacher and/or school social worker to notice a string of symptoms.  For this blog's purpose, we won't be discussing DSM-5 issues.  

Parents please understand, a child disrupting class, skipping school, failing in a series of exams is not usually the result of laziness or stupidity.  One can't scold or hit their child when there are underlying factors.  In the next blog, I will provide a list of free government resources that can explain and offer solutions to Chinese parents.

In the mean time, I implore parents to be more involved in their children's schooling.  

Dr. Pat

Who am I?

My name is Patrick So and I am a father, the middle child of seven, a school social worker, a psychotherapist, and a deacon for the Catholic Church.

I was born in China in the early 50s, before moving to Hong Kong.  I studied at National Taiwan University and graduated with a degree in Chinese literature and sociology.  At NTU, I also met my wife.  We immigrated to the U.S. in the late 70 to continue our education at New York University.

I toiled in New York for over 10 years before receiving an opportunity as a social worker at Hamilton Madison House (a Chinatown based nonprofit).  I would then go on to serve the Board of Education as the only bilingual Chinese and English speaking social worker in Brooklyn for over 25 years.

For nearly 40 years, I have lived a life where I have been poor, experienced near death experiences, an epiphany to serve God.  And in all this time I have always felt the grace of God.

I am truly thankful for all his blessings.  I have a devoted wife, a lovable but sometimes messy son, a saintly daughter-in-law, and a beautiful home.

It is for these reasons, I dedicate my life to serving God and His church on earth.

Pat